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Blogs > stormyjan > Stormy Nights and Days

Things not to say during sex.  

stormyjan 51F  
133 posts
3/27/2011 5:31 am
Things not to say during sex.

I have to poop.

Smile for the camera.

Get off me, I'll do it myself.

This is your first time...right?

You're almost as good as my ex!

When is this supposed to feel good.

I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs?!

I was so horny tonight I would have taken a sheep home.

Keep it down, my mother is a light sleeper.

Hey! My friends were right! You are good!

On second thought, let's turn the lights off.

I'm sobering up and you're getting ugly!

But everybody looks funny naked!

Do I have to pay for this?

No! You're too fat to be on top. You'd kill me!

Actually, your sister likes it like this.

What's your name again?

Hold on, let me change the channel.

It's nice being in bed with someone I don't have to inflate.

Uhhh..I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago.

You don't sweat much for a fat chick.

You took so long I started without you.

Are you in yet?

Is that your thumb?
It was a dark and stormy night
I had my best orgasm.




horny196364 60M

3/27/2011 7:09 am

 love to chat with you sometime


shewontquit 56M/52F  
20 posts
3/27/2011 12:38 pm

 "You don't sweat much for a fat chick"


stormyjan 51F  
35 posts
3/27/2011 1:47 pm
    Quoting shewontquit:
    "You don't sweat much for a fat chick"
LOL I will add it to the list.
It was a dark and stormy night
I had my best orgasm.



dome4fun41 59M
2 posts
3/28/2011 10:46 am

 very cute facts I'll remember not to say those things


SexiLuvinGirl 65F
6975 posts
4/2/2011 8:47 am

 Love your bling!


Have a safe and happy Halloween!
To Visit My Blog, please click here.


asternman 65M
Ask me for a photo

4/2/2011 9:54 am

 LMAO...very funny. "It's nice being in bed with someone I don't have to inflate."

Wow, you're cavernous, how about rolling over so I can use the door.

It would be nice if you were tighter.


delivertoher1 62M

4/12/2011 6:13 am

 Funny stuff! Would love to chat with you some time.


rm_13CandyCrush 55F
6 posts
6/28/2011 5:46 pm

 [/THATS AWSOME, SO MANY OF THOSE THINGS WE THINK BUT NEVER SAY OUT LOAD....PUT A SMILE ON MY FACE....XOXOXO


rm_Northstar474 77M
55 posts
9/2/2011 9:04 am

 Are you dry or am I licking the rug?
"Honey, are you dry or am I licking the rug?"


Gatehouse62 61M

10/21/2012 3:49 pm

 When a M cums quickly, he turns to F, and says, "Ive cum, its not my fault you cant keep up".


funguystu 62M  
56 posts
9/15/2015 1:40 pm

 nice list


LakeRidgeBBWSeek 63M
3847 posts
9/20/2018 5:48 pm

 I HAVE said 5 of those things, no bad reactions from the gal, and have HAD 4 of those phases said to me, again with no bad reaction from me. But in most cases those would not be good to say unless you know your partner very well.


88stoneman 65M  
Ask me for a photo
2 posts
1/19/2019 6:28 am

 Those are so funny,,,luv em...


Stellaj22 52T

9/19/2021 6:28 am

 oh fuck my husband is home !!


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